In early sobriety, the first three months anyway, I revered most of the happy faces I saw in meetings. They acted as if there was nothing to fear and everything to love. I was far from where they were and would express it when asked to share. There were some meetings where I would be left behind, as the chair knew my message. It was always the same: about being a victim and how my new life directly reflected my old one. Nothing had changed.
      Then came the meeting, which changed my outlook on life. You see, I’m a Pisces by birth. One of the personality traits of being born in March is we need to see things before believing them. After the meeting, a member sat me down with a picture that put everything in perspective. It showed a small river with two banks. There were twelve stones to cross the river. He said how being on one bank was my old life. The fear of losing my job, family, and myself in the bottle all resided there. Peace, harmony, prosperity, serenity, and happiness are experienced on the other side of the river, where the smiling faces live. He said how each rock was like one of the steps. When I am on the first rock or step, all I can see is what is behind me. He said there would be times when I would think about returning to what was familiar. He explained how the secret was to keep stepping on each stone in front of me. He then said that once I got closer to the other shore, it would become evident that the Promises of AA were coming true. He then reminded me how there is work to do at each step before stepping off to the next.
      The good news is the old way of living will become a memory, and the new way will be so exciting as each new door is unlocked. Behind each one is the dream I never knew existed outside of my addiction.
      I will forever be grateful for him showing me that picture and explaining how what I thought was impossible is now a reality. I dared to take that first step of willingness and believed in how others felt the process would work.

Thank you God, for taking me where I did not want to go.